Overcoming Self-Doubt and Judgment: An Honest Conversation with Alex King.

I started to feel like a [ __ ] loser and if I tell you I don't want your advice on it then don't give me your advice on it he said to me babe like why I'm downed I'm talented no one gives a [ __ ] I just don't care people like the look of you when they find you online and they think oh what happens when people criticize your performance I have spent more money on that business than I've made money that's actually the perfect answer what I was wondering I don't like being called an influencer I like never again did I think about that if you suck don't ever do that again speaking to Alex today was like talking to an inverted mirror she would say the

same lines that I would say she had similar upbringings to me but her perspective of it was exactly the opposite on the other side of the spectrum and I find it fascinating to hear people with like just such immense Talent think the way she did so watch the interview find out how she thought and hope you enjoy it welcome to the podcast thanks so much for coming on thanks for um want to quickly intr yourself and we'll get into it hi I'm Alex um I work in media and entertainment and I pretty much have for the past eight nine years now um yeah' just been doing that yeah pretty much media entertainment Med entertainment um so8 n years yeah give me that CV tell me

what's what's happened tell me the Highlight moments of that period yes so I think I first started uh um I have come from a very Performing Arts music entertaining background with my family and I have always just sung and wanted to do acting and that was always just kind of who I was in school and growing up Performing Arts um and then throughout high school and my teenage years I was kind of figuring out what I wanted to do do I go with all the other kids and do what everyone else is doing and go to UNI and do the same thing cuz I don't want to be out of place y um or do I go own way and I kind of just did

what everyone else was doing at the time got a little bit lost in that Y and then finally um found my feet in radio and I accidentally found myself there um while I was doing a acting school and an acting workshop and then um through radio kind of made my way into back into acting Y and my passion of music kind of came full circle while I was in radio and and then I've kind of ended up here working a little bit in digital marketing do you even call it digital marketing it sounds way more professional than it actually is it's social media social media and yeah de yeah thanks de social media thanks um but that's where I've kind of found myself today is

just uh another wannabe actor living out the Glorious life of auditioning and auditioning and auditioning yeah um and then trying to find other things to keep your life moving and pay the rent yeah that's a that's a big one right keep the cash coming in yeah um okay there's a few things I want to pick out and talk about and as I said off camera I kind of want to know where you're at where you're going MH and you just said then that you're another actor trying to make it pay the bills and do it this what is why is that like why are you pursuing this acting thing like why is that something you're still going after especially given like the other things that

you've done already and had some somewhat success in yeah I think um throughout my entire life it's kind of been acting and music and I think acting took more of a a prominent turn in my life because when I was sharing myself and who I was on the radio um I found that I didn't like sharing a lot about who I was because there was a lot of judgment that comes with that and so that kind of hindered sharing myself authentically yeah um because it was really scary and I found that with acting I am playing a character this character's been written for me I go to work I put on a mask if someone comes up to me and goes I hate that character

you played I don't give a [ __ ] cuz I didn't write it it's not who I am it's not me yeah but for example with music and singing it's a lot more authentic and it's genuine to who I am as a person I'm sharing a slice of myself I've worked really hard on a song that comes with a lot of baggage and emotions and things that will probably relate to a lot of of people but it's a lot harder to share that side of myself so I think that's kind of why I've which is quite sad to admit that but I love acting don't get me wrong it is fun and honestly being able to play characters that you never thought you'd be able to do

and and reenact people and things that you would just never get to experience in your own life is super fun and exciting and I love that but it's just I guess L scary for me yeah yeah okay that's interesting because I I saw the clip um of when you when you first launched the song on radio yeah and like how nervous you were and scared you were and I found it real interesting for like someone who won you're already on radio so it's not like you're not already a personality before You' done it like where does that come from like why why why are you why do you have that much nervousness around the music and stuff like where does that stem from um I

mean I think I've been going to a lot of therapy recently and pouring into myself and try to understand why I am the way that I am and I think generational trauma has a role to play in that um and I think I grew up around people who were loved me but they were very harsh critics and I grew up in a home where it was like if you're going to try something you better be the [ __ ] best at it or don't try it at all um and so that's where a lot of that nervousness comes from because I think I still want to the inner child in me wants to appease those people in my life um and so I guess that's where a

lot of the nervousness comes from and I mean as I get older it's like I've learned to not be that way but it's still it's still really scary because I think I'm still I guess with the world of social media and just at the fingertips at people's fingertips you are crucified yeah um and so yeah I don't know it's just a weird a weird thing about me that I've just held really close to my chest yeah yeah it is a hard thing I mean lots of people like I ask that question but a most people actually feel that way yeah you know and especially in creatives creatives are like the most judgmental of themselves out of everyone all of our creatives in this team are

like the biggest critics of themselves but I found it real interesting when you said there that you had people who you either win or you don't win yeah growing up it reminds me a lot because so I had the same childhood so my dad my dad's favorite saying was um there isn't winning isn't uh everything it's the only thing and that's that's all we got drilled that into us and that was sport or education or whatever it might be y we weren't very I'm not a creative there weren't a lot of creatives in in our house none of us can sing or dance or act or anything like that right or maybe I can act now know kind of kind of um but it's interesting

like how the same message and how different people are taking like mine's the opposite just as bad which is I don't give a [ __ ] what anyone thinks which gives me into just as much trouble or more trouble because I just do things with not worrying about the repercussions and the consequences on it but I find it quite interesting like talking to people who are like clearly talented and clearly like brilliant at what they do have that like um you know they're just like not sure like they're worried about what people are going to think when they're like clearly [ __ ] talented you know and and I and I and I also find it quite when I hear you say I had people around me were like

you got to be good you got to be the best sorry not not you got to be good you got to be the best yeah have a different like they experience that different than I did yes maybe that's just cuz I wasn't a creative no I think it's it's interesting that you say that cuz I my partner he loves to sing and I hope he doesn't mind me saying he loves to sing and he always says I'm not the best at it but I love doing it so I just do it he has no cares about how he sounds if he sounds good if he sounds bad he just loves doing it and that was never something that was instilled in me as a child

it was like if you suck don't ever do that again yeah really don't ever do that again so it's really interesting hanging out with people who just have this passion and love for things and just try it even if they're not good I think it's a lot of I mean I've got 27 years of unlearning to do but um I am trying to unlearn that trait of just try it even if you're not good at it and even if you don't end up up being the best at least you tried and had the courage to do it yeah because yeah that's something that I've definitely pick up with a lot of people that just do things even if they're not the best yeah yeah I

Blissful ignorance sometimes yes but um but you know then my full circle for that is but you did do it you did release music you do put yourself out there you have been on TV like and acting roles and stuff how did you manage that then like what was it that got you to release that song the first song My radio coach Jason Royal uh at the time we would have weekly chickens and he would kind of just roast us about what went good and what went terribly bad yeah yeah yeah and um he said to me babe uh people like the look of you when they find you online and they think oh you don't sound like what you look like I'm really loving

the way that you look but they're judging you purely based off of the way that you dress and the way that you look and we don't really know a lot about you other than your pretty and you got the gift of the gab what is what else is there and I like got up in arm like there's eggs about me I'm down I'm he was like well tell us that yeah and so I think that was just the kind of that's great advice the the pushing of uh me releasing that song because it's we want to know more about you rather than just surface level stuff but I found it really hard to share that stuff about myself because I'd grown up in a family

where everything was shared all the time and I kind of wanted to as well explore this business and industry because i' been around it my whole life but not wanting to share that just things that I hold close to myself yeah which is I guess looking back a waste of talent and time I suppose yeah I mean you don't have to always exploit all your talents yeah yeah you don't always have to something PR be personal yeah I think I just like I was focused really on making really good content and call now this has happened to you um rather than being like this is what about cuz I and sometimes I get into this hole of where I think no one cares like no

one cares but there are people that follow me that care yeah yeah yeah so I think I I get into that self judgment zone of no's actually going to care what I say or do but yeah people do do you know what I love about that what I love this conversation so far is I feel like I say exactly the same thing as you all the time but I say it with a different intent so I also say no one gives a [ __ ] about what I say that's awesome I can do anything yeah and you're like no car I say I shouldn't do anything yeah it's such an in like you've heard me say this right he say that every day every day like every

day what you've said has come out of my mouth all the time but my intent is so but awesome I'll just do everything I don't care if that's got spell mistaken I don't care if it's got that because like no one cares about me yeah no one cares about me it's like parallel perspective yeah yeah it's quite interesting because like how do you find that when you think to yourself no one cares so I'm just going to do everything cuz I'm on the opposite end of No One Cares I'm just not going to do it yeah so I think what I what comes through my head is that if I really think about whenever I've judge someone and I've thought about because because that's what

I'll do I'll go what if someone does judge me right and I go okay well when did you judge someone and I'll think about something when I judge someone and thought something about them or back that guy's Shir or whatever and then I thought okay so after that moment when did you last think about that and the answer is always never like never again did I think about that I just don't care like I've moved on I'm trying to get dinner I'm trying to do something else I'm trying to solve this problem I'm trying like I I have no I'm way too selfish yeah to keep thinking about that person who' made that terrible song like I'm too self like I got way too much

going on in my life so when I realized that I was like that's what I keep saying and I'm like I I don't dwell on how terrible she is with her song like I'm never going to sit here by night man you're so useless yeah I just so I might think of once but then it's gone yeah so then I think well everyone must do that right and if I ask you guys like whenever you judge someone you're not going to sit there and think about how bad they are for a week you're just not you've got other priorities in life so then that means that if if if a million people didn't like the song they all heard it or whatever the clip or

whatever it is it's definitely not a song with me yeah they instantly don't remember or aren't thinking about it again they instantly aren't and then the ones who do care and love it the same thing applies very rarely do we see something that we love and then just continue thinking about it music's slightly different and I can give that music plays a different role in society than most other creative formats um it's why the musicians are the biggest highest viewed things on YouTube it's why you know tsth can do $2 billion in a year on tours because like music has a different things like positive music like that experience but actually most other things people just even if they really love it they'll just move

on Tik tok's been in has been a really interesting thing to watch because uh we'll watch videos crack up have this laugh you can never find it again so you don't even like the ones that you love like you're like this is so funny I've shared it to all these people and then I asked you a week later what was that video who made it wasn't you like I don't know yeah I don't even know what the guy look like yeah he was hot though yeah he hot that's all I remember I felt something you know yeah that's all I got um so anyway I I think that's kind of the I as I've grown up and I've thought about it more cuz my partner's

more like you my wife thinks like you do more than I do she's on the same says the same stuff on the other side of the spectrum and then we have those conversations as we learn together and I kind of realized that's what I was doing like I just realized that no one gave a [ __ ] yeah um so it's not that I think my Way's better either and this is what I say my wife cuz like again like I said it means that I do things that I shouldn't do maybe I should K yeah maybe I should like like tone it down or not Shear as much as I do like some of my team like St I can't believe like you posted our financials

publicly I can't believe you told everyone how much you pay gave me my pay rise that's my pay rise I was say yeah but I gave it to you so like but because I just don't care yeah but that's just as bad right you know so like I'm not saying mine's right actually they they're on the other opposite sides can find perfect median yeah it's a weird one yeah anyway I'm gone on a tangent it's just so interesting to hear you speak cuz I as Le said it's like exactly what I of a different intent completely different opposite different opposite spectrums anyway I've gone on a tangent um okay so you you you fought those sort of demons whatever it is to try to get

through that but acting gives you a different place because you get to play a character yeah what happens when people criticize your performance of that character yeah look different different story then again you know and people are like she's a [ __ ] actor yeah but I have a lot of Grace for actors okay because I love watching things and I'll often watch things I'm not actually watching for the plot I'm watching the acting couldn't really kill this I mean if it's a good plot you're going to think about it anyways but I'm often just watching the actor acting and do I believe this person got it and a lot of the time if I don't believe them I still have Grace cuz going up there and

doing that is [ __ ] hard and having people go you suck at acting well you come do it yeah you come do it yeah and then then tell me how it feels yeah tell me what it's like cuz I guarantee you standing up in front of 20 extras 40 extras sometimes hundreds and running your lines and trying to stay in character and this character is the complete opposite person as to who you are yeah it's so hard it's so difficult so I don't really have that sort of same judgment like people tell me I'm a [ __ ] actor all the time and I'm like okay well great you come and do it I think it's just that's the only way that I can look at it because

I just have so much grace for actors and and I watch a lot of things that you know my friends and I watch they're like they sucked I'm like dude you going do it yeah do you have the same like you can't apply that to singing or content creating or I think it's I I don't know I look at it I'll tell you right now someone who cannot sing but I watch people saying I'm like I'm not trying I [ __ ] cannot do that yeah yeah yeah yeah it's hard as [ __ ] I don't know I've just always been very self-critical and I think again that comes back to my family like my dad is hugely self-critical yeah like he'll speak about [ __ ] that you'd never think

of saying in the public yeah and he'll go home and criticize himself yeah a million times over more than anyone else so I've grown up in a home where it's like we're really good at things and you need to speak your mind but then [ __ ] I shouldn't have done that and should maybe I should have been better yeah I don't know it's just it's different for music cuz it's I've created it and it's come from a place of uh authenticity I suppose and it's that authenticity for me that I really struggle with that's that that makes sense that makes sense to me that is a difference there that makes sense um okay we'll stop digging into your trauma um sorry it's just interesting for me

to hear because I I'm fascinated by it yeah because I I'm always around these talented people who are just like I'm like you're [ __ ] phenomenal and that you hear them or see them do their thing and then they criticizing St like are you kidding me like I wish I had half the talent in that respect that you do and I guess it's always grass's greener kind of thing but anyway I'm fascinated by it okay so get rid of the trauma talk acting what does that look like for you from a career perspective like because acting's a hard world to get into so like is it just I mean I saw what you did a Like A Day in the Life thing of you just uh

pumping out the self tapes yeah like yeah tell me your acting Journey right now like is it just a bunch of like I hope I can catch something like where where are you at with this well I have um I signed with an agent in La last year cool which was really exciting and something that it's never I've never done before I've only ever just had an agent here in New Zealand um and so that is just kind of you are a very small fish in a very big pond and you are pumping out all the auditions from that really shitty Prime movie that you're probably never going to watch and maybe you do cuz you're hung over one day and there's nothing else on

Netflix that you want to watch Y and you think to yourself what the [ __ ] is this [ __ ] um to you know shows that we have here in New Zealand and um it's just a constant being told you're really great you're perfect but you're just not quite right it's like going to a job interview and having all the right qualifications and then still being like you're too tall for the job what or you don't look slightly how one of our producers want wants you to look so you didn't get it and it's a multitude of people that have to agree on yep we're going to hire her we're going to cast her yeah rather than just one person the boss you know it's like seven to

10 other people that are like we really love Al and then one person that's like I'm not sold I'm not sold n she just she's not going to get it yeah so it's just um I I watch a lot of like successful actors who are you know World known and um they often just say that that you do acting because you love it and you're passionate because it is something that is so terribly hard to break into and it's a lot of the actors that are successful now are just the ones that didn't quit yeah yeah 100% yeah I just think I have to keep going and going and hopefully one day it'll happen or it won't but whatever is meant to be will be

it is one of those things I've seen that like as well when you're look into actors and film and television that like so many of them made their break in their 40s you know it's like but they had been trying since they were 18 Steve Corral and he finally cracked it and now he's one of the biggest stars in the world yeah but then again you think to yourself do I want to [ __ ] wait till 4 I don't think I can be a struggling act till I'm 40 [ __ ] it's like Sylvester Stallone I think he got his acting career like 50 or 60 yeah wow yeah he he had a second wind of his he was he was still in his 30s I think when

he got his first one but he his acting career is crazy I mean he was doing P to do porn to yeah his first gigs with porn yeah um okay let's not get into that conversation um so that that's why I wanted to ask that question because people watch that is the acting World reality yeah like there's the exceptions to the rule where you can break in young and get into it and take off there's those exceptions but like it is a um a game of attrition yeah to make it so then that leads me nice good segue to like so then how do you pay the rent yeah like how what what are you doing to make the most of this brand that you've

got and still succeed see I I was having a conversation with my my therapist this morning because I have a really I struggle with being called an influencer I don't like being called an influencer I think because it's my inner critic that is like I'm more than an influencer I'm talented I don't just make get ready with me videos like I think that there's a huge stigma around influences and it's like what do you do you make get ready with me videos you make damn it life vog and you get instantly you're judged off of that and it's like oh I swear I'm I'm so much more so I I struggle a lot with being called an influencer and then on the other hand especially

last year I just stopped posting unless I had to post because I needed the money yeah and that is a terrible way to use your platform I found out yeah um but I yeah I I'm I'm working through it now but it's that struggle of being called an influencer because of the stigma but then again am I that person that's supposed to change that and show people like we don't just do [ __ ] get ready with me videos bro it's so much more than that and there are so many people that I know that are creators who are incredibly talented in storytelling and hooking you into watching a three minute video and all of that stuff and I I think I have struggled with it because

I want to be something outside of a content creator so it's like that just push and pull of trying to be authentic with my audience not standing in my way cuz I am in my own way and realizing that I have thousands of people I think there was that trend on AI where you're like put in how many people how many followers you have and how many people that would be in a room and like I've got like a stadium full of people that follow me like if I got up in front of a stadium full of people who gave a [ __ ] about me it's like crazy to think yeah 100% um so I am now at a point where I have started to share

more of my myself authentically online and that comes back to singing yep it is something that is just it's deeply passionate for me I love it but a lot of people don't even know that I sing yep interesting um and so sharing that online is something that I have uh I'm striving to do more of yeah um and then also I guess battling that stigma of I'm more than an influencer and also changing that narrative yeah for people and I think um that where I'm out with that but in terms of paying the bills yeah a lot of it comes from from influencing I'm very fortunate to have an agent who bets hard for me yeah and I I do love making content I think

I just struggle with the what's content that's authentic to me yeah you know and finding that balance of Storytelling but also fitting in the deliverables and every the dos and don'ts of brief because people forget that you get a brief that says you can do this and you can't do this and that's what people don't understand about content creation it's that these people have taken like the smallest amount of things that they can do and blown it into something so much more creative yeah um but that and then again starting my own business in social media yeah and kind of just dealing with clients that way and running their social medias um and like BTS photography has become a huge thing people that can't really

afford videographers at their events like weddings and birthdays and just being there and doing that and making videos that if but would I be happy with this post it on my Instagram that's how I create content for other people it's like if I would like it I can send it off to a client yeah yeah and most of the time yeah they they love it so that's what I do okay I'm going to break this down a little bit because there's so much you just unpack there um but the first thing is when you comes to your creating content M for yourself do you think that um you talked about authenticity MH which is the same word you use for music but not the same

thing you use for acting mhm and do you think that if you created a channel that was purely acting because you made it you can't do it because it's now yours like as in you remember how you said when you made music it came from you it was your thing yeah now people can criticize but when you take someone else's story other scripts it's fine because they can't criticize you cuz it's not yours yeah is that a reason why you can't create content that's not authentic that plays character or have you just never thought you to do that cuz you know like like like think about like um what's the guy down in Wellington that [ __ ] um I'm real bad of names he did the

Rihanna's videographer at the Super Bowl video come on I know his name anyway he he plays a character okay and I'm so sorry bro he sat right in that couch and his name's right on the tip of my tongue and I can't get it out um I know him anyway but he plays a character in all his content yeah because he's an actor yeah and then that took him off to F like two million follows or something yeah oh I know wait see it's right the because we know him we've met him plenty um um he does the videos where it's like he'll reenact like in the movie he'll do the scenes right or he'll do like he'll do like um uh that that bartender

at every nightclub POV that bartender every night I can't remember oh it SS of an O Ollie Oscar uh I know I'm so I'm this is bro when he watches we should probably cut this but he's [ __ ] you anyway you get the question the question is is there have you ever thought about creating content that wasn't authentic that was a character um I I don't I haven't thought about that only because from where I've come from in radio I am my own brand yeah and they have pulled out of me trying to be more authentic that it's kind of just drilled into me to make content that is authentic to who I am yeah I think I like to leave acting and playing a character

and like social media separate yeah I don't know I've never really thought about it that's interesting yeah you know what I'm gonna I'm gonna tease on this for a bit just to I don't know where it goes but other people might find B if you don't um people think of social media as a singular thing MH that people think my social media is an extension of who I am and it's not at all and you know that but you think of it as and it's definitely not you only put up what we want you want other people to see it's definitely not an extension of us it's a reflection of us but it's not an extension of who it's not part of me and so

we get this feeling of our social media and brands do the same thing Brands be like no no this is my handle like I've got to do it like I got to do everything I need to do on this and I was like you know you can create another account r that can just be another thing that isn't you the same way you can go act in a movie that isn't you yeah but it's a it is like this reflection of some of you you still put yourself into these characters and and emulate them I mean it is you acting as them there there is no different in you creating a show on social media just using it as the platform to get the show

out yeah so that you get the more attention because the more attention allows you to you know more exposure more attention just helps you in most aspects of getting career advancement right but then people will say like say in radio they like oh it's a personal brand you got to grow your personal brand and all sort stuff and there's nothing wrong with that conversation cuz you do but like that you are an actor too so there's no reason why you can't just be like I'm going to create a show m I'm G create this TV show that's only going live on socials and I'm gonna play a character and because you can play a character you can do things that are humous or entertaining or

whatever that aren't in your life which means that you can share whatever you want and do anything yeah cuz you can always hide behind a character it can have truth from you yeah you can talk about your experiences but you talk it through a character um like Julian Su um who does the Paloma he does it MH you know he great and I mean he's blown up recently now over the states and stff and he gets to hide behind his characters but he can like have real conversations about the things that he's concerned about yeah but he also has this layer of removal from him so people like oh that's Paloma having that conversation yeah right but actually of course it's him yeah still doing

it yeah and so I think like with I there's a there's a thing with actors that they kind of um what I've found is that some of them have been told don't do it because there's also an element of you might not get gigs well that's the thing that's what a lot of us are it's do you want to be taken seriously as an actor and if you do then I wouldn't make so-called cringy content but then again it's that other flip of the coin where it's exposure and someone might go she's actually really funny and she'd be great in the show so I I don't know I think it I think I purely haven't done that because of what I've heard from a lot

of people who go do you want to be a Tik Tok star or do you want to be an actor it's there's two different things so I I don't know I think I've always just kind of focused on trying to be as authentic as I can and making content that I like this is going to sound real cynical of me but I feel like that advice comes from an industry having control for sure you know not from an industry with your best interest at her and I'm not saying I completely agree but I just think it is and I don't think those people do it intentionally yeah it's just that hum like protectionism is a big thing in culture we just can't help but protect

our status quo M but I it kind of reminds I think it's Cal newo writes this book called um are so good they can't ignore you yeah and that's the My Philosophy on it it's just like I mean Julian's a good example and uh this other unknown creator that I can't remember his [ __ ] name um the same is that they've just gotten so big they started getting doing heaps of other [ __ ] yeah same with like the comedians who did it on on socials you know like whether you like like some serious comedians will like bag out like Matt R for instance for being not a serious comedian I was like he doesn't care I mean he sold out 600,000 tickets in 40 minutes wow across

this Global tour like you know I mean you know how much comedy show was like he made a shitload in 40 minutes right it's like what are you what are you in it for you know and then that that what that allows him to do is he's like well I can just now fund myself s to live my thing right I can and keep honing my craft do whatever he wants to do he might not and just make hips money and whatever but I think like I think that if you I don't I'm not telling you that's what you should do not at all my advice but I think the advice of like don't be a cringey Tik Tok star is only good advice if

you're [ __ ] at making content yeah if you can't actually act and you can't actually create yeah but if you can it doesn't have to be cringey there are some creators out there who make [ __ ] awesome stuff that like any um any like director or cinematographer will be like holy [ __ ] like this guy's actually really good like this's this young kid we know Jackson who we try to hire for him for us for our dating void editing but K Shakur like this massive Creator over in the States has just hired him on a full contract to run his entire YouTube channel just cuz how good he is at creating content he putting on his channel right so these sorts of opportuni come but like you don't

have to be a cringy Tik Tok dancer or yeah of course of course and that's not like what I think of people that 100% I people do yeah I I guess so I think we're also in a generation like my generation who are so quick to judge and so quick to cancel and so quick to be like you [ __ ] suck what the [ __ ] are you doing especially living in New Zealand like people when you're up it's like you suck yeah we love you when you are a nobody and not trying to make your you know a name for yourself yeah so I don't know I've never really thought of it that way I think I've that that advice has always kind of hindered me to

not do it and just making I used to say to myself like if I could I just wouldn't have social media yeah but in this economy it's just I could not no basically no but it's I think it's also trying to I mean there are people that I follow like content creators that I love who are just themselves and not actors they don't do anything else other than content creation and I love following them for them purely because I like their life and the way they live their life and they've got this you know big beautiful family of course they're only showing you the highlight real but um that's something that I like I follow people because they are people yeah and I think that's

where I try to come from with my content is that I'm a person but again like citing another social media account I've I've thought about it once to do like a what do you call like a Finster you know like whenever I'm posts like authentic photos it's just a pain in the ass to [ __ ] manage it's like a third account plus all of the clients accounts that I manage already it's like I can't be asked I'd rather just focus on my own oh for sure you know oh it's edmin it's edmin and I think I praise the people that have like seven different accounts and they've all got huge followings cuz I'm like you do that yeah you need you need a team yeah yeah

I need a team but unfortunately I don't have one no that's any way like it's like us like across our eight or nine platforms that we have like if we didn't have a team we couldn't be I couldn't do it I mean one I don't know how to make the content yeah I just like turn up and yeah yeah um do this uh but it is a lot of work it is a lot of work to do and I guess my my my line of questioning was rather than you starting one is like uh is that understanding of like could you if you're trying to find acting roles how do you like how do you take control of that Destiny well I think now it's

it's a Time where I need to be creating my own stuff like sharing stories that I want to share um authentic to who I am um but also playing a character like I want to write things about myself playing Alex King by Alex king um so I think it's more about I've seen you know actors who have made their own stuff especially New Zealand comedy shows that now they are actors over in the states doing amazing things I think that's kind of like the route that I want to take okay it's more just getting out of my own way because I'm standing in my own way I hesitate whether or not I should put something out and like for example back to singing videos or

something I'll play it to my boyfriend all my friends and they're like I would have put this out yesterday and I'm like oh but there's this one section in this bit where I could have just like held it on just a little bit and I just constantly overanalyzed yeah yeah yeah yeah so that's again why I like acting because you have a director who's like no it was great we're not doing it again yeah yeah yeah you're like sweet I thought that was [ __ ] but great yeah and then you watch your back you're like [ __ ] I wish I didn't use Ed it how much music Have You released one song is it just one I thought there was at least two on Spotify that I

saw but I wasn't sure if there it's again it was this Workshop there was this Workshop that I did and I think they had all the right ideas about what they wanted to do with the workshop but the whole we all knew going in the whole premise of doing the workshop was to release the music at the end yeah of the workshop whether or not it's good whether or not it's finished the songs that I released sucked ass and I hated them and I didn't want them to be released but the whole point of the workshop was that it was going to be released so there I think there's one song on it that I feature on a on a really talented artist song but

n one song that I've put out myself and is that a path that for you is like either like go back to or is it something that you kind of like releasing music yeah I mean 100 but again it goes back to the financials of things and like having that money to go into the studio and pay my producer and I don't want to go in no one's doing freebies anymore like no one needs promotion because you can self-promote anywhere that you are and producers are doing that they're going on Tik Tok live they're going on Instagram live they're doing their own promo so it's like I will do your song If like I shout you out and blah blah blah and I think that

worked well for me when I worked in radio cuz it's like we can get our song played on the radio got it um which was like a nice pull but yeah I think it's just the financial side of things as to where I've gotten like I've written songs and I've got songs and it's more just recording and releasing them is very costly yeah of course so it's more financial that's interesting so if the finance was taken aside MH do you think you'd have the confidence to go and do it yeah really yeah interesting yeah have you got it like have you got material already mhm got it yeah it's more just I am a perfectionist to a fault and I'm going to go be like

I don't like that change that and also working with producers here in New Zealand who have a certain tone in a way that they want to sound I found that they don't tend to stray from what they used to which I get it you're your own creative person and you are a producer but at the end of the day if the song [ __ ] sucks and it tanks everyone's going to go to Alex King songs not produced by blah blah blah of course not but because my producer was like I don't like that and then everyone says that's the part of the song I don't like you're like [ __ ] know I should have just stood my own ground so again it's finding those relationships with producers

that actually give me the creative control to be myself yeah and then just stand in the background and go we could do this or we could do that but that's very hard to find I've found that yeah so many producers in New Zealand go this is how I want to sound and these are the songs that I've made this is how I want you to sound and so it's hard for me because I don't have a manager like a music manager who's in there going Noah she doesn't want to sound like that that's so I find it hard to stand on my own two feet when a producer pushes back and I'm like okay we'll just try that even though I know in my head

and I trust myself based off of the first song that I put out lots of people loved it and the whole creative Direction there were a few obviously people that were in there helping me but a lot of it was like this is what I want I don't want this I don't want this and everything that was in that song was purely ticked off by me I said Yep this is what I like and then now moving forward working with producers they're like I don't like it and I'm like I find it hard to and that's so fasc yeah so I think the money thing is more just having that creative freedom of being able to hire producer who doesn't make music purely to know

be known as a producer they're just producing the music I'm like can you play this can you do that sweet cool I've paid for it done that's so fascinating cuz yeah that if you're paying them [ __ ] they should be doing what exactly but but I guess with a lot of producers nowadays especially they're young and up and coming they want to make a name for themselves and they want to have like a significant sound as do all the American Producers yeah yeah yeah so it's hard to kind of find my own feet in that world on my own yeah that is crazy can we just check the cameras yeah right we're good well what's the running time uh 45 minutes oh yeah K that's what

I've got um that fascinates me that like I [ __ ] hate that sort of [ __ ] the red tape of people going like people overstepping their boundary yeah you know like if if if if I pay you to do something do the thing I paid you to do and if I tell you I don't want you ad on it then don't give me your advice on it yeah if I pay you and ask you for your advice and you don't give it to me the same thing like I ask you for your advice give it to me yeah but like uh especially cuz it's I know it's not cheap no it's not cheap and that's why people are like where's the next song and I'm like well

I it's thousands of dollars down the road that's where it is yeah interesting yeah okay so as we start to wrap up this conversation I want to then think about the social aisle because this is business now MH and this is the reason why I want to talk about it because like this is like a whole another thing yeah it's not just making Social Media stuff you have to like go out and find out business and deal with clients and Do Contracting and all that sort of stuff and then deliver results and invoicing and all like why um because I am really good at making my own content MH Once I Was Made redundant from my job in radio people were like just do social

media you're really good at it which I again how should people me that cuz I'm like I'm more than that then I realized like no I am pretty good at making content I'm pretty good at making a video and my friends always say if it's got the Alex King approval it's it's good to go anywhere yeah and so I just make stuff now with clients that when I sit down with them I you know explain to them what we do and they tell me what they want and basically it's just a space where I'm comfortable I know that I could do it from my home from an office from Australia from New York it's not something that's diff ult for me to do um and

it pays well and people want to have as much as people don't want to admit people want to have cool social media content yeah like a lot of people will say dumb you give them a really cool video they're like posting to my friends on my Facebook and my Tik Tok it's like Oh I thought you said that it was dumb now you like it so it's just having that eye for something that I would like on my social media I make for clients yeah um and like as you go through that process of like building out this business is it like have you looked at it like just percentage wise of income for you rather than giving any specifics like how much does it

make up from that versus the the money you get from Brand deals and whatnot like the comparison yeah like as a as a percentage of your income how how important is social aisle to you in your income um I have spent more money on that business than I've made money okay that's actually the perfect answer what I was wondering yeah I've spent more money on that business than I have made money um and because I'm doing everything myself I refuse to hire people yeah and I think I'm a little bit of a control freak like I de with my best friend and shout out to Moira but I am a control freak when it comes to what we're posting how we're posting when we're posting

and things get lost I I think a fault to that is because I've got seven other brand deals on at the moment that I have to go out and film I get the social F often gets the back seat where it's like if I just gave a little bit more leeway or hired another person to do it I just I have this yeah it's the control thing that I'm like I I think why people like the videos that I make is because I've made them yeah rather than having someone else be like take that same template and make it themselves yeah um but yeah no I've spent I've made 5% of what I make in a in a brand deal yeah yeah so that's why

I was wondering like why didn't do it because I think it's again goes back to that like it's it's a comfortable aisle for me to sit in yeah I don't have to stray too much but also I do enjoy it I guess it's just like another side hustle everything that I do like the brand deals and social media is everything is a side hustle to acting in music eventually I want to be able to make so much money that I don't have to do any of it and I can just pour into acting in music and put out stuff that I want to put out but it's just another side hustle and it's another way of of showcasing I guess those skills that maybe other

people don't have but want to utilize yeah but you enjoy it I enjoy it yeah yeah I mean there's days where I'm like I don't want to [ __ ] go to wedding for yeah but I mean at the end I I love seeing people cry over the videos that they've watched I've made them and it's that's really nice cuz yeah cuz that's kind of what I was asking cuz it seems like a I've talked to a bunch of creators who have these side hustles like this and none of them tend to make lots of money on it especially once they're like quite good at getting brand deals yeah and you know when you bit of a personality the brand deals can be quite lucrative yeah if

especially if you've got a good Agent like you say you do right um and then they also so they've got this they get they're making money from Brand deals yeah they've got this this other business that they' created some of them have got two or three of them yeah that they've decided to do and then they're like oh about my true passion is I want to become an actor or singer or whatever it might be right and I'm like so in your case social a is net negative but the worst thing is it's the time that then can be put into my like the focus of how do I get more acting well that's the thing I think I I think I started the social

AIS because I was doing so many auditions that I wasn't getting that I started to feel like a [ __ ] loser got it and I started to feel like a failure failure and it started to feel like can someone just [ __ ] tell me that I can't act cuz all you [ __ ] are saying that I can but the results the math ain't nothing I'm not getting any of the roles so someone's lying to me and I need to create something that doesn't make me feel like a loser but I have something outside of who I am as an actor and trying to be I think that's kind of why the Social Hour started purely was because I didn't want to feed in I didn't want to feel

like a loser of auditioning in the morning and then making content that I wasn't really passionate about because I was unsure of how to share that on social platforms like I am clueless when it comes to social media and people think that I'm actually quite switched on which I don't know if I should say this on the internet but that's fine um I just yeah do things that I think are cool and I like doing it doesn't really there's no kind of set plan which may be to a fault of my own but um yeah I I think that if I just poured purely into acting it is going to auditions and being told you're great but no thanks Time and Time and Time like

I have been to hundreds of auditions and gotten one or two things and being told you're really talented but you're just not right for this eventually it eats at your soul where you're like okay so I've been told my whole life I'm really talented but nothing is coming my way yet um so I need to go do something like a normal job I don't feel like a loser and that's where radio came in cuz it's like I had something to go to um and I need and I think I fell into the I was Alex King from mym and that's who I am as a person and it's not as my job um and so yeah I guess also just kind of finding myself doing

the social AIS is I'm learning more about me at the end of the day I like that that's a great answer it's very healthy answer yeah you know because cuz Bing yourself all into say is like there's advantages to it yeah there is of course uh having focus is very like effective for getting places faster yeah but it's not for everyone to go full in cuz some people can't handle like you can't handle the heat so you to get out of the kitchen right because it's hard it's real hard and like some people very few people are psychopaths like me who just like don't care what other people think and can just go keep going yeah it's probably still not healthy for me to do

it either but I do it anyway yeah yeah so that's a great answer because I like that because you're not using it necessarily like it's not it's not they like oh this better make me money it's like no this this allows me to have some normality yeah and makes me feel like I think we live in a society where it's like if you don't have a job but I think it's changing now with social media and Tik Tok and things and creators and Gamers as well like it's such a norm to just is a job exactly what is a job but I think as well to like my family and my mom especially who doesn't really understand social media I'm like I have my own

business and then in her mind she's amazing she know any [ __ ] money but like it's something that she goes oh my daughter owns business and she's up andc coming actress and blah so I think it's just yeah that sense of not feeling like I am pouring into a career that doesn't pour back into me yeah and it is yeah at times so destroying but I think having something else on the side makes you feel like a little less of a loser in my eyes I get it I get it I'm not a loser but you know I know you're saying that's why I'm saying I get it because you're not a loser obviously and actually you're still so [ __ ] young and like I know that

doesn't help you at all like running out of time exactly and so many of us especially in our 20s were like [ __ ] I Should Have Made It by I used to think that and in my 20s I used to think I was running out of time I should have own I should own a home by an hour and my friends on a home I should be married have kids yeah it's that constant like you're not doing enough exactly so I think yeah and I also think doing the social aisle like I'm learning how to make better content for myself yeah because I'm making content for clients it's like if they don't like it that's my ass on the line you know so I'm I'm learning

more about like making content in that regard but I still have so much to learn in the content space yeah no I like it it's a good answer and like my questioning is definitely like not to say you shouldn't or should oh no no it is what would you do though would you have like businesses I would lots of other business but I would do what you're doing I I do recommend it yeah because where I think creators go wrong is they don't think of themselves as a business yeah and they just think of themselves as an actor yeah and any good long-standing actor doesn't think that way yeah like unless of course it's like Daniel de Lewis who's just like I only do one

and then I'll get an Oscar like there's certain people who are outrageous but the longterm standing actors understand they're a business and they bring people in and around them to run themselves as a business M so you learning business is like probably the best thing you can do right now yeah by far I think eventually I want to be able to hand the social aisle off to someone and someone buy it and then it be there and I've done done my bit but um yeah those lessons will be powerful for you to know for yourself yeah when Alex King is the brand is the business yeah that I think so many of the young creators I talk to don't realize that yet yeah they're just

like no I want to be an actor on it's like no like what you're telling me is like I want to create a business called Alex King yeah one day yeah and now you're learning business through doing your own one doesn't have to make money well it obviously making money is good yeah and the better you are at making money in Social means you'll be better at making money with Alex King yeah so I actually think it's a great thing to do yeah it was just I was just wondering it was interesting because I was wondering like when I was doing a little bit of research before you come on how is she like it doesn't seem like it's it seems like exactly what you

just told me it is it's a it's a it's it's doing well it's like it's got It's got it's moving it's going along mhm but it's not like you know it's not bring home all the bacon she's obviously making all her money for these other things she's doing yeah it keeps me accountable it makes sure that I show up every day and that if I'm slacking like for example I had to give my best friend who I run the business with a verbal hiding the other day cuz she just wasn't doing her job and I'm like look if you don't want to do this with me that's cool I'm going to go do it myself I need you to lock in and that was kind

of where I I hate having hard conversations especially comes back to music and acting and with my and doing certain things that if I can have hard conversations with people in business then it will just transcend into other things that I do in my life y absolutely I I think there's a what you're saying there is like you also as you grow Alex King as a business you need to also learn to be a leader yeah cuz cuz actors have heaps of stuff yeah heaps of them yeah like heaps of stuff to keep themselves running and everything that they need to do and to be you'll have to lead them you know you might end up leading two or three of them like agent and

EA and whatever yeah but you have to learn leadership yeah and business allows you to do that yeah and I think so I think it's quite good I think it's like quite a healthy way to look at Social yeah it might turn into something big and you seller for a few Mill awesome I mean a few hundred thousand would be great to whatever right take anything it's more just eventually I want to hand it over to someone else who does the whole running of it and then I've just started it and it's created what it needs to create um and eventually have staff who just run the whole thing and I get paid a small portion of it they go off and do it all

that's the dream that's the dream so yeah it's kind of just that thing where I wanted to put my finger in all different pies because I think right now if I can't afford to pour into acting and music cuz it does come back to money at the end of the day um I should just be networking with a whole bunch of other people to make sure that hey this is what I do and I actually do more than just one thing mhm hire me cast me I love it and I think with that we wrap it up that was awesome thank you so much like thanks so much for coming on super interesting to hear that part of story cuz every all the research I

did I didn't get any yeah I guess I kind of just say the same spell because a lot of podcasts you go on they ask the same questions they ask the same question and I just watched it so I didn't want to ask it again so thank you so much appreciate awesome